Author Topic: Share your weird retardisms (Read 19858 times)

Sashamaru · « **on:** March 02, 2010, 02:18:02 PM »

Post things that you've done, or still do, that are retarded.
Like the title says, not only must it seem kind of retarded, it also has to be weird.
The more unique, the better.

Don't post anything objectionable enough to either lock this thread or start a flame war

Feel free to comment on other people's posts but make sure to contribute something of your own as well.

I'll start:

There was a period of time when I was around 9 or 10 years old when I forgot how to swallow. I could only eat pea soup and cheerios. For some reason I just sort of.. auto-swallowed those. O_o; Otherwise, I was conscious of the process and no matter how hard I tried I wasn't able to swallow any other kind of food. This went on for several months, I believe.

Here's another one:

Every so often, I'll randomly and inappropriately insert the word "hamburger" into a conversation. This amuses me. I don't know why. It's not premeditated, either. It's just a spare of the moment decision. I have a haunting feeling that my friends truly believe I have a screw loose. Well.. shit, maybe I do. >__>;

(click to show/hide)

OK, that ought to give you an idea for what kind of weird retardisms I'm talking about. If you're OCD and you have a weird idiosyncrasy, that works too.

Enzedder · « **Reply #1 on:** March 02, 2010, 02:56:05 PM »

I have a few retardisms that I can contribute while I am here. I will post some more later probably.

"So"
For some reason I when I talk to speak I naturally end a lot of my sentences with 'so'. Some might have picked it up in my posting as I often type it as well. I try to clear that up as much as possible though. I dunno what exactly it is or where I picked it up but it annoys the shit out of me sometimes. I think its because rather than explain the obvious I leave it up to them to fill in the blank.

"When a mummy and a daddy..."
Basically as it sounds. Whenever someone asks me a stupid question or one I don't know the answer to I just reply with the Birds and the Bees speech, "When a mummy and a daddy love each other very much....". At that point I am usually strangled or told to shut up so I never really get to finish but I never want to anyway.

Friend: I hate it when they end a movie with a cliffhanger for a second movie. I mean WHY!?! Why do it!?!
Me: Well you see, when a mummy and a daddy love each other very much...- ^_^
Friend: I hate you. -_-

There are more but its 2am so.

P.S. I won't remove that one purely to show what I mean by the first retardism.

mgz · « **Reply #2 on:** March 02, 2010, 09:25:25 PM »

well me and my friends have a few retardisms some times its just babbling on rhyming words that are even remotely close to double and pronouncing them dooble and rhyming mumbling words till it gets to the point its just nonsense sounds and its hilarious.

Other being when we were watching OZ, the secretary for the warden says something about a meeting and tells him a time and say On the dot in a funny boston like accent and now at random we will just say AWN THE DAWT
in a high pitch retarded boston accent and its fuckin hilarious. Because anyone can join in for a few seconds after its been said once.

roihoxai · « **Reply #3 on:** March 10, 2010, 10:30:28 AM »

I am afraid of bald Caucasian men. No reason. No idea why. Just scare me. I once pushed someone down some stairs to get away....

and on the topic of stairs.... >///>

I am afraid of escalators. Like crazy afraid. I was finally getting over it, too and we were on an escalator in Shibuya and there was a loud noise and the escalator stopped. I freaked out and turned to run into the people behind me who were like, "o_o wut." I was crying when we got to the top.

I reply with "Ha?" too much when I'm confused. My teacher is trying to get me to stop that since ハー？　Is sorta rude... :/

Meomix · « **Reply #4 on:** March 10, 2010, 03:24:23 PM »

Meh cant think of much since i was locked in the house often to prevent me from doing stupid shit. But one time has got to be when i almost strangled my self with those zip cords that DO NOT COME LOSE once locked.

harpy · « **Reply #5 on:** March 10, 2010, 03:54:50 PM »

I often talk about myself in third person. Something like that
A person - "What have you been up to? "
Me - "Well harpy was there and there and she was doing this and this and she was thinking that and that"
and so on

Blacklancer · « **Reply #6 on:** March 10, 2010, 04:06:51 PM »

Quote from: roihoxai on March 10, 2010, 10:30:28 AM

I am afraid of escalators. Like crazy afraid. I was finally getting over it, too and we were on an escalator in Shibuya and there was a loud noise and the escalator stopped. I freaked out and turned to run into the people behind me who were like, "o_o wut." I was crying when we got to the top.

Then you should be happy that you weren't with me in the elevator. There was this one time when we were in an old elevator during a holiday in Rome. It said it was only made for 4 people. I went inside with 4 friends and a stranger. One of those friends was.. kinda fat.. He roughly weighed about two times the weight of a normal person. We were going up until the second floor when I got this crazy idea to start jumping... and suddenly all my friends joined in too...
So the elevator started shaking and somehow it was very funny so we all laughed, except for the stranger who was scared shitless (no wai, why did he do that?) But we made it to the top floor nonetheless.

oh, there was also a time when I was kinda neurotic.. I was like 11/12 years old and I somehow had to do things ten times over... like closing the door ten times... locking my house ten times when going out. Luckily it stopped after 6 months or so.

Carnivus · « **Reply #7 on:** March 10, 2010, 06:39:48 PM »

I once forgot to swallow as well.
Once,at a party,I was teasing a girl,she wasn't paying too much attention to me,and I asked someone why he did something.The next second I hear my classmate shouting "Because airport".Now that's just weird.

shabutie · « **Reply #8 on:** March 10, 2010, 08:40:08 PM »

I talk and sing aloud to myself at work quite often.

Usually, I talk as if I'm talking to someone or presenting something to someone. And it's never about normal things, usually about religion/theories.

One of these day's I'm going to bring a tape recorder and file it. lol

Oh, and I also randomly break out in song when I hear something that reminds me of a song.

fohfoh · « **Reply #9 on:** March 10, 2010, 08:58:10 PM »

When I'm too hyper to read properly (Too quick, won't retain things) I read with the book upside down. People think I'm crazy or dyslexic when I'm in public.

Ixarku · « **Reply #10 on:** March 10, 2010, 09:55:47 PM »

You people are strange and should feel bad about being strange. OK, maybe not the latter.

There are a lot of things about me that are probably slightly odd, but the only unreasonably weird thing is that, for a while, for no particular reason, I was uncommonly paranoid about accidentally dropping my keys down sewer grates. If I happened to have my car keys in hand, and I walked over a grate in a street, I would actually thread my fingers through my keychain to reduce my odds of being a klutz and dropping them. And I'm not particularly clumsy. I got over that eventually, though.

I also get distracted / bored in meetings very easily, so I have a long standing habit of doing that stupid pencil twirl thing where you spin a pen or pencil around your thumb. I'm left-handed but for 20+ years I could only do that with my right hand. I do various other twirly things with pens as well when I get bored or distracted.

Micharus · « **Reply #11 on:** March 11, 2010, 10:14:39 AM »

I will sometimes talk to myself, even if there are other people in the room.
I also talk to my car or the car I am driving when it's not behaving while I am driving.

I've also been known to do sound effects while playing games that I'm *really* getting into.

Another thing I have to be careful with is copying peoples accents.
If I'm in a room with someone who has an accent, I will mimic their accent (without knowing that I am doing it), which can be really embarrassing for both the person whose accent I am copying and myself.
I often have to conciously stop myself and apologize for doing it.

forsaken · « **Reply #12 on:** March 11, 2010, 11:19:17 AM »

Soem good ones in here, nice idea for a thread ^^

You know how as a kid you used to play a game where you don't step on any lines?

I still do this. Always and subconciously. I literally don't think about it or notice it unless I really try hard and then I can spot that I'm diong it...

Only I don't just use obvious lines that are drawn on the floor, I actucally extend all corners and edges in my mind. If I walk past a corner, I won't step on the line where the wall would be if it extended past that corner. If I walk past a gutter (or any rectangle on the floor) I'll see 4 lines in my mind that extend from that rectangle's edges into infinity.

I don't mind stepping on the lines, I'm not paranoid about anything happening if I do, but I subconciously avoid them nonetheless xD

Enzedder · « **Reply #13 on:** March 11, 2010, 11:45:07 AM »

Quote from: forsaken on March 11, 2010, 11:19:17 AM

Soem good ones in here, nice idea for a thread ^^

You know how as a kid you used to play a game where you don't step on any lines?

I still do this. Always and subconciously. I literally don't think about it or notice it unless I really try hard and then I can spot that I'm diong it...

Only I don't just use obvious lines that are drawn on the floor, I actucally extend all corners and edges in my mind. If I walk past a corner, I won't step on the line where the wall would be if it extended past that corner. If I walk past a gutter (or any rectangle on the floor) I'll see 4 lines in my mind that extend from that rectangle's edges into infinity.

I don't mind stepping on the lines, I'm not paranoid about anything happening if I do, but I subconciously avoid them nonetheless xD

Have to agree with this one actually. Number of times I will subconsciously extend my stride just that bit further to avoid the cracks is amazing. I have caught myself doing it multiple times.

I think a guardian angel is watching over me. The number of times I have avoided accidents, serious or minor, by the slightest of margins is weird. I have gotten to the point where if I realize that I was close to getting injured but didn't I thank a little angel. I named her Serephena. ^_^

PrOdiGyiNaCn · « **Reply #14 on:** March 14, 2010, 11:51:59 PM »

I still subconsciously avoid sidewalk cracks too. I don't know when I realized I was still doing it, but if I am walking alone I catch myself changing my stride to avoid them. 25+ years of avoiding sidewalk cracks...

shabutie · « **Reply #15 on:** March 15, 2010, 04:28:10 AM »

Quote from: PrOdiGyiNaCn on March 14, 2010, 11:51:59 PM

I still subconsciously avoid sidewalk cracks too. I don't know when I realized I was still doing it, but if I am walking alone I catch myself changing my stride to avoid them. 25+ years of avoiding sidewalk cracks...

I do that as well. I also try to space out my steps so I end up starting each new block with my right foot forward, taking the same amount of steps on each block... No clue why... force of habit.

Lord of Fire · « **Reply #16 on:** March 15, 2010, 12:46:10 PM »

Quote from: Enzedder on March 11, 2010, 11:45:07 AM

I think a guardian angel is watching over me. The number of times I have avoided accidents, serious or minor, by the slightest of margins is weird. I have gotten to the point where if I realize that I was close to getting injured but didn't I thank a little angel. I named her Serephena. ^_^

I've actually survived more accidents than a regular human being would. The worst I ever got was a broken collarbone and that was from a minor accident. It's getting to the point where I fear that falling down the stairs might actually kill me faster than anything else.

Anyway, as for retardations: try taking two tests in school for subjects you don't have because you keep mixing up in which class you're supposed be in and are too braindead to realize that. And then feeling like an enormous idiot when your classmates point that out to you. That was 20 years ago, but it still haunts me till this very day.

Talapus · « **Reply #17 on:** March 15, 2010, 01:00:00 PM »

Quote from: Lord of Fire on March 15, 2010, 12:46:10 PM

Anyway, as for retardations: try taking two tests in school for subjects you don't have because you keep mixing up in which class you're supposed be in and are too braindead to realize that. And then feeling like an enormous idiot when your classmates point that out to you. That was 20 years ago, but it still haunts me till this very day.

And at no point did you ask "How the hell am I supposed to know this?"

I remember the first day of class one semester when I sat down in the wrong classroom. I sat there and pretended I was part of the class for an hour because I didn't want to walk out in the middle of it. It was an upper division EE course, and I had no clue what the prof was talking about...

isukianime · « **Reply #18 on:** March 18, 2010, 11:31:06 AM »

I talk to myself while driving alone....not a lot mind you but enough. whenever someone looks at me i just pretend i'm on a call using a hands free device.

kurandoinu · « **Reply #19 on:** March 18, 2010, 11:35:00 AM »

If I'm in a public bathroom, I won't come out of the stall until theres nobody there if I can help it. Obviously I can't do this in busy ones, but I do it all the time at uni. Just stand there and wait until anyone else is gone. I hate meeting people in the loos.