Went down to my local off-license to buy myself a bottle of fine whiskey as a little birthday treat, only to discover that the poor guy's had to stop selling whiskey because the Tesco down the road kept undercutting him and pretty much just drove him completely out of the market

A real shame, I'd much rather buy whiskey from a nice local independent company than from Tesco. At least it's still a good place to get beer and wine.
There's now nowhere else nearby to buy good whiskey either - and when I said Tesco is down the road, I meant 25 minutes walk down the road.

OT: When people write in such a way they makes it unclear whether they are talking about bytes or bits.
I was perfectly clear. I am supposed to be getting 26 megabytes per second but I only get 128 kilobits per second.
Lol.