Author Topic: I am getting my own harem!  (Read 6789 times)

Offline Semnae

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I am getting my own harem!
« on: July 02, 2011, 03:48:30 PM »
My apartment lease ends on July 31st. On this day, I am losing my current roommate, a woman I don't consider remotely attractive. In exchange, I will be moving in with my girlfriend and her two single attractive friends.

The point of this thread is two fold. First, I just want to brag a little bit. I'm getting my own fucking harem! It's a small harem, but a harem none the less, and maybe I can grow it more later. Few men get an opportunity like this!

Second, I think about all the harem anime's I've watched, and realize this could become disastrous. Does anybody here have any harem management experience? My girlfriend tells me that after a couple months of living together, their periods will all probably synchronize, which is both relieving, because I want more than one week of peace per month, but also very scary, because that one week is going to be explosive!

How do I make my harem more like this:
(click to show/hide)

And less like this:
(click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: July 02, 2011, 03:50:40 PM by Semnae »

Offline TMRNetShark

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2011, 04:19:04 PM »
Easy... never fall down or trip over something near the girls... That's rule number one!

Rule number two: watch what you say. Seriously, most arguments are over misunderstandings.. .. and periods don't help.

Word of the wise: It's not like the other girls are gonna be all friendly with you (maybe they will, I don't know). But more than likely, they are just going to have their own guys over themselves. At least you will be seeing them in PJs/underwear... so in that sense it'll be great. Another upside is that you can use their tampons as nose bleed reducers (cause this is a harem, so you will get lots of nosebleeds!).

Downside? Your bathrooms will be girly. Your apartment will be a mess (girls only clean up when they are ready to bring a guy back to fork). Pay especial close attention to what they say because it will cause problems if you don't listen (getting 2% milk instead of skim/soy will have them rip your head off). Lastly, girls are and forever will be just as disgusting as men. The only difference is they are disgusting in their own homes while men don't care where we are disgusting (don't believe me? Watch after 3 months).

Good luck... and I don't envy you (Unless you do actually get to be in a foursome and you are the sole guy... then you fucking lucky bastard!).

Offline Nikkoru

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2011, 04:58:22 PM »
It's thoughts like these that land men in long term legal proceedings.

I was in a rented townhouse with 4 attractive young ladies for the last two years, the ultimate result was a hell of a lot of cleaning on my part, an unreasonably long period of time holding my urine in during the morning, and excessively loud music played until 3 AM. Suffice it to say the romantic shenanigans and fleshy misadventures were being had by their boyfriends and in one case girlfriend, which given the noises were hard to miss.

They did give me the first 3 seasons of Battlestar Galatica for Christmas though, which was nice of them.
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Offline Reape

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2011, 05:20:42 PM »
Is there some actual point in this thread?  ???

Online TiYlER

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2011, 05:28:56 PM »
Is there some actual point in this thread?  ???
yeah, so he can prove how his life is so much better than mine...


Lucky you dude, I always wanted my own harem!

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Offline datora

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2011, 05:37:16 PM »
.
How do I make my harem more like this:
(click to show/hide)

And less like this:
(click to show/hide)

Your mistake here is the assumption that this represents two different 'harem types.'  They are actually the same harem.


Is there some actual point in this thread?  ???

Well, he stated his intention pretty clearly: bragging rights.

Give it about four or six months: he'll crawl back here and necro this thread to tell us how horrible his life is living with three women and two bathrooms.
I win, once again, in my never-ending struggle against victory.

Offline Reape

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #6 on: July 02, 2011, 05:41:51 PM »
Well, he stated his intention pretty clearly: bragging rights.

We already have this though.

Offline mgz

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #7 on: July 02, 2011, 06:30:33 PM »
Is there some actual point in this thread?  ???
yeah, so he can prove how his life is so much better than mine...


Lucky you dude, I always wanted my own harem!
well obviously guy on guy harem is just gross and gay

Offline Muk666

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #8 on: July 02, 2011, 07:06:25 PM »
At first I thought what a lucky dude but then I remembered 1 woman can be a pain and you will be living with 3...

I hope all your harem fantasies come true but please try and keep your sanity and stay alive for the next 6 months.
Dont know what to put here

Offline xyx

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #9 on: July 02, 2011, 07:14:56 PM »
your so dead.

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Offline Goroshi-sama

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #10 on: July 02, 2011, 08:18:49 PM »
just hope you arent going into the "NICE BOAT" ending!

they see me rollin', they hatin'..

Offline bork

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #11 on: July 02, 2011, 08:26:12 PM »
I have enough to do in working with the one girl in my life. Unless you come up with some agreement on allow you attention to wander a bit, as is was said before, you are "so dead'.  You will loose all of them with just one small misstep.

No matter what is agreed upon between you and you your girlfriend, in her mind you belong to her.  If you look anywhere but at her there will be thoughts that maybe you are not interested in her.  

I was going to try and touch on a few things that could be a problem but my mind just went into overload in the amount of trouble your going to get into.  Just figure you and your girlfriend might not last past a year unless you can absolutely make a clear distinction between living with just friends and living with girls.

Online TiYlER

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #12 on: July 02, 2011, 08:26:59 PM »
just hope you arent going into the "NICE BOAT" ending!
aw shit. Avoid that at all costs.

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Offline x5ga

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2011, 09:22:49 PM »
your so dead.

QFT. And I can say that from experience too. No harem anime describes the level of despair you will be in :)

Offline TMRNetShark

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #14 on: July 02, 2011, 09:29:25 PM »
just hope you arent going into the "NICE BOAT" ending!

Oh no, YOUR HEAD! Your getting a head job! XD

Offline Sosseres

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #15 on: July 02, 2011, 09:34:41 PM »
I like the thread. I think it is unrealistic though. Don't try for a harem unless your GF encourages you (how to achieve this is the problem), otherwise you will get kicked out (which you knew already).

Offline AceHigh

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #16 on: July 02, 2011, 11:03:40 PM »
Christ, why would anyone want more than one woman? I can't be arsed to give enough attention to one, not to even mention as many as three. Good luck, you will still not get laid with all 3 of them at once unless your girlfriend is as liberal about sex as mine is, however you will be bothered by them three times more than usual.

For one thing, Tiff is not on any level what I would call a typical American.  She's not what I would consider a typical person.  I don't know any other genius geneticist anime-fan martial artist marksman model-level beauties, do you?

Offline apriuschan

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #17 on: July 02, 2011, 11:24:00 PM »
Personally, I think a harem is overrated. That being said, yeah, I wouldn't mind having one. Only because I'm not indecisive, though.

If one of them starts scratching at their neck, even if it's your girl, cut and run. I guess I should say 'Good Luck'. I won't though. Have fun~

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Offline 1000mAh

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #18 on: July 02, 2011, 11:31:21 PM »
When ever you fail just say:
''what can I do? I'm just a man.''
That often works :P

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Offline Chiyachan

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Re: I am getting my own harem!
« Reply #19 on: July 03, 2011, 09:03:58 AM »
Good in theory... Fucked in reality.
You've signed off your own death warrant.
Seriously, I wish you good luck and all, you'll need it.
Prepare for trouble, make it double. (And then triple).
Note, your girlfriend will side with her friends in an argument.
You'll have messes everywhere.

The MOST important thing you need to do is cover ground rules ASAP.
1) Time allotted in bathroom and a bathroom order on days everyone goes to work.
2) Kitchen maintenance. Who cooks, cleans and keeps tidy? Note, you'll probably not all have group meals so you'll want to insist on, "if you've made the mess, you tidy it."
3) Keeping rest of house tidy. Assign a room to each person.
4) Have everyone contribute £2 into a pot every Monday. That way if something does go wrong and something needs replacement, there'll be cash to do so.
5) Food buying. Figure out who buys what. Sharing all food? Then share prices, otherwise buy individually and keep separate from everyone else's.
6) Don't stress too much when stuff goes wrong, which it will. Women are temperamental and are happy to sulk and pout and get angry to get their way. Don't allow this.

That may help a bit. But really, -enter funeral march-
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