I used to be bullied like you. Then I drank milk and got high grades.
Fucking hero.
It's a genius solution, really. Drinking milk around the clock will give you really bad breath, so nobody will want to come within arms distance of you, and if someone chooses to fuck with you your bones will be strong as fuck and you can just brush off whatever beating they give you. Not to mention having a round the clock milk mustache would make you look homosexual, hence sending all the girls your way because they feel comfortable around you and don't suspect that you'll rape them. Also, since you've probably grown an utter or two from all the growth hormones, you can just milk yourself and have an infinite supply of milk to protect you from the evils of the world. You'd essentially become a hero of sorts, fighting bullies and bad grades with the pull of an utter. Also, all the ladies will see your dairy-induced awesomeness and want to suck on your utters.They won't mind your milk-breath seeing as they are shallow creatures and are only interested in your milk. You can possibly trick them into thinking your penis is an utter and the best part is she wouldn't even know the difference until you came, and then you could just tell her that's specially fortified milk with extra protein. You could also milk yourself and live off of the income. All of this combined would make you a seemingly gay super hero guy who gets high grades, drinks free milk, is impervious to bullies, has women flocking around him all day, gets blowjobs all day and lives for free.
This is quite possibly one of the hallmark ideas of the 21st century.
