Discussion Forums > The Lounge
Your Funeral
flyawave:
Seeing as I'm probably donating my body to science/ donating my organs, there won't be much of a body to bury/ burn, but there'd still be a ceremony. A short one, like; "Today, we lost a don. He shall be missed" And that's about it.
AnimeJanai:
If it was to purely conservative concerns:
Then I would make sure everything is given away with good timing so that family (and a few others who I like) have all the wealth and not the taxman. Get the final no-fault cheapest possible divorce papers signed so that the costs from my death do not transfer to wife or other family members. Have my poor decrepit body deposited on the doorstep of the politician I like least. I want to be "useful" right to the very end and annoying a career politician is good. Only problem is that most of them live in guarded walled-off elitist communities, so getting to them is hard. I guess that is how they separate themselves from the people they ostensibly govern/rule over in today's still-evolving neo-feudalism.
For homeless and poor, the hospital governing body has interesting approaches to avoid taking care of them by just giving out the most rudimentary minimums such as aspirin or pain killers in hopes they will then die of exposure which is much cheaper than admitting them to the hospital. For people who try the tactic of stumbling in to emergency to take care of things, the laws were changed and an "urgent care" facility branch of the hospital was opened about a mile away as walking goes (crow would fly there in shorter distance though). That's to treat non-surgical emergencies which is a clever and legal way to force the indigent away from the hospital proper and put them far away and in a place that will force them to sign paperwork to owe money or not provide treatment without payment options signed. That type of legal rigamarole was done because the hospital executives wanted to go private, but the public kept on voting the way it did. Since it's staying public for sure now, the hospital has been doing some strange things to try remaining profitable. The hospital executive board reminds me of politicians who forgot they were elected by votes to serve the voters but instead serve their own personal prosperity, then the prosperity of their family, then their friends, then their business allies, then their party, then associated politicians and favour seekers, then the voters last. The gov't will then cremate me as that is the cheapest approach. It has been throwing ashes into the county trash dump along with all the other poor or homeless people it was forced to cremate due to bodies being found here and there. That was made possible by ruling cremation ashes are sterile and can be placed in a dumpster provided it is packaged so that powdered ash doesn't become airborne. A friend works at a funeral home and I got a tour years ago. The gov't spreads the "body pickup" contracts around to all the funeral homes and that seems to be the biggest source of business for many of them! I suspect some funeral places form not so much as to serve the public prepaying for a funeral plan or paying a retainer fee for a funeral plot, but rather, to serve the cremation market of the large number of indigent bodies. A HUGE HUGE number of people die destitute due to medical expenses because as elderly, they get tossed for running out of money for utilities and rent. The exposure on the streets kills them pretty fast, so there actually is some huge number of dead per day that the cremation services pick up. If there is overflow like more than 40 dead indigents per day, then the funeral homes (like the one my friend is at) get some of that gov't body overflow. Since I would be dead, I don't mind if my ashes are mixed with kitty litter poop, diapers, or thrown away DVDs or Blurays of Guilty Crown whose former owners had loyally dropped the series decade after decade. I'd be in good company because I've dropped Guilty Crown every day for having terrible plot, music, and character design.
Ultra_Magnus:
I plan to be cryonically frozen until I can be reanimated, so no funeral for me :laugh: .
Sarapico:
... buried is, weird, and ends up giving too much trouble to others. Cremated and the ashes dropped somewhere will probably be the way to go.
Or do like Strong Bad:
http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail168.html
"Brother in a Jar!"
Saras:
I'll demand a cover of Tom Jones - Sex bomb to be played by the orchestra. Other than that, don't care.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version