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Are You Alone?
harpy:
I think this goes here...kind of...
Well I have been trying to connect to these two teens I am here with (they have shit for brain) and I decided to try listening to music I used to love when I was their age to get in all the shirt for brain mood.
I have come to a conclusion (one beside the fact that I used to listen to loads of crap) that I have no actual right to talk about relationships. Well I did fall in love once or twice (I think, not quite sure about it now, I might just had fun) but it never actually hurt me when the relationships ended (well I just got into another one right away and did not spent to much time thinking about it) and I mostly saw relationships as a way to have fun and get stuff for free... well I tend to see them the same way right now as well ;D
I wonder - what do you people think - what relationships should be about? (beside fun ad free stuff if you are a female)
metro.:
--- Quote from: harpy on March 16, 2012, 09:50:06 PM ---I think this goes here...kind of...
Well I have been trying to connect to these two teens I am here with (they have shit for brain) and I decided to try listening to music I used to love when I was their age to get in all the shirt for brain mood.
I have come to a conclusion (one beside the fact that I used to listen to loads of crap) that I have no actual right to talk about relationships. Well I did fall in love once or twice (I think, not quite sure about it now, I might just had fun) but it never actually hurt me when the relationships ended (well I just got into another one right away and did not spent to much time thinking about it) and I mostly saw relationships as a way to have fun and get stuff for free... well I tend to see them the same way right now as well ;D
I wonder - what do you people think - what relationships should be about? (beside fun ad free stuff if you are a female)
--- End quote ---
Whoa, harpy is a girl?
Or did I just read that wrong.
But yeah, relationships are about uh...sex and comfort. And if you're a girl getting free stuff, otherwise giving away free stuff.
I've never been in love, even though I've faked it several times because it seemed like the right thing to do. I think they're supposed to be about love though. So I've been told by my friends in relationships. They're about sex and love. And I really don't see that second part coming through for me.
Ixarku:
--- Quote from: harpy on March 16, 2012, 09:50:06 PM ---I wonder - what do you people think - what relationships should be about? (beside fun ad free stuff if you are a female)
--- End quote ---
There's no single, absolute answer to this. Different people want different things, and that's entirely okay. Some people want love & companionship; others just want sex and to have a good time; still more might be looking for someone to take care of them, or for someone they can control. The important part is honesty & communication. Establish expectations early, make sure the other person understands your feelings and is on board, but be ready to change your mind and react to the situation as it develops. It's fine to be indecisive as long as you don't lead the other person on or otherwise deceive them. It kills me how many times I see drama unfold simply because someone in a relationship is unwilling to or is incapable of expressing their feelings.
Me personally, my passions don't stir easily but they run deep. I don't fall in love often but when I do, I'm usually pretty well fixated on that other girl. But I'm also very introspective, very independent, full of a lot of self-doubt, and I need a lot of space and time to myself, so I can't be with someone who is too needy or too dependent. I'm not the kind of person who smothers my significant other, and I can't handle anyone who would smother me, try to 'change' me, or who would try to control me. I doubt I'll ever be in another serious long-term relationship again, but should that unfold, I would really need to be with someone who is a foremost an equal, a friend & a partner. I'm likely to eventually lose interest in a casual relationship with someone who I can't really connect with on any deeper level. Doesn't mean I'm adverse to having a casual relationship that's just about having fun and/or sex, it's just that something like that wouldn't last for very long for me. In certain ways I'm usually very guarded emotionally, and it takes a while for me to connect with new people.
AceHigh:
--- Quote from: metro. on March 17, 2012, 04:46:00 AM ---Whoa, harpy is a girl?
Or did I just read that wrong.
--- End quote ---
She would answer tha question with "Harpy is not a girl, harpy is a harpy"
However some of us know that she is that Lithuanian brunette who tends to hide her face behind a beer mug when posting her pic on bakabt boxtorrents (it was that long ago).
SilverDash:
--- Quote from: harpy on March 16, 2012, 09:50:06 PM ---that I have no actual right to talk about relationships.
--- End quote ---
Sure you do. Everyone does. Because it's personal for everyone. Even if you never had one you still have that right because you might still be looking for a relationship for x reasons. Those x reasons give you the right to talk about it imo.
--- Quote from: harpy on March 16, 2012, 09:50:06 PM ---I wonder - what do you people think - what relationships should be about? (beside fun ad free stuff if you are a female)
--- End quote ---
Same thing, there is no "should" imo. Relationships have a million different reasons or so. jealousy, sex, domination, unwanted child, power, (other) political reasons, arranged marriages, protection, adventure/danger, making your parents mad, etc, etc,etc,etc.
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